Friday, December 28, 2012
Friendship
There really is something to be said for friendship. The people you thought would be there for you and support you turn into traitors.
Ok... that's a tad dramatic.
For the last 2 years 10 months I have felt her pulling away.
It started when I went to Florida diving without her (she couldn't' get the time off).
Then I stared seeing Rob. Then I went to Missouri diving at Bonne Terre. She wasn't interested because it was cave diving... but not actual caves. Her choice.
That summer, in August we went for a dive at a quarry in the area... Rob and the kids came to swim and hang out. They brought the dog too. They were asked to leave because of the dog and Rob and the kids waited outside of the park for Melissa and I to finish. She thought it creepy. In her opinion he shouldn't have waited, but taken the kids and the dog home. We were planning on going for dinner, so he waited... they played games in the car, in the shade and were not bothered at all.
She has confronted me with her concerns before... that Rob is abusive and controlling. I disagree and have talked to others, including Rob about this. I told her she was off base, and that if anything I am the abusive one...
Then I moved in with Rob... and 2 months later the migraine started. And it won't go away. Medications, diet, massage, acupuncture. Nothing works. I try to function the best I can. I try not to burden my friends with my worries and concerns. I know I can be very negative, and as with everyone... sometimes you don't say the positives about your self and your relationships with those around you. You bitch and vent... and bitch some more.
She took it to heart.
Today she told me my friendship is toxic. She thinks I should move into my own house and Rob can come visit me everyday. She also said I need mental help. And that my not moving back to my place is sacrificing my well-being. I apparently I am hurting myself and she can't be a part of it anymore.
my response to her "If you choose to walk away from our friendship that is your choice. Just know I appreciate everything you have done for me, all your support and your friendship. Also - for introducing me to sushi :) I consider you a cherished friend and an amazing person. Always."
So. I am down a friend. When I already feel very alone, thanks to this migraine.
Ok... that's a tad dramatic.
For the last 2 years 10 months I have felt her pulling away.
It started when I went to Florida diving without her (she couldn't' get the time off).
Then I stared seeing Rob. Then I went to Missouri diving at Bonne Terre. She wasn't interested because it was cave diving... but not actual caves. Her choice.
That summer, in August we went for a dive at a quarry in the area... Rob and the kids came to swim and hang out. They brought the dog too. They were asked to leave because of the dog and Rob and the kids waited outside of the park for Melissa and I to finish. She thought it creepy. In her opinion he shouldn't have waited, but taken the kids and the dog home. We were planning on going for dinner, so he waited... they played games in the car, in the shade and were not bothered at all.
She has confronted me with her concerns before... that Rob is abusive and controlling. I disagree and have talked to others, including Rob about this. I told her she was off base, and that if anything I am the abusive one...
Then I moved in with Rob... and 2 months later the migraine started. And it won't go away. Medications, diet, massage, acupuncture. Nothing works. I try to function the best I can. I try not to burden my friends with my worries and concerns. I know I can be very negative, and as with everyone... sometimes you don't say the positives about your self and your relationships with those around you. You bitch and vent... and bitch some more.
She took it to heart.
Today she told me my friendship is toxic. She thinks I should move into my own house and Rob can come visit me everyday. She also said I need mental help. And that my not moving back to my place is sacrificing my well-being. I apparently I am hurting myself and she can't be a part of it anymore.
my response to her "If you choose to walk away from our friendship that is your choice. Just know I appreciate everything you have done for me, all your support and your friendship. Also - for introducing me to sushi :) I consider you a cherished friend and an amazing person. Always."
So. I am down a friend. When I already feel very alone, thanks to this migraine.
Dragonfly 12/28/2012 05:51:00 PM